Anyone here invest in gold?

Gold is not necessarily a tool to make money. Gold is a tool to preserve wealth.
It's an asset. If you have a 1400 dollar gold asset and the dollar loses half it's value, it will take 2800 dollars to buy the same ounce of gold.

Preserve wealth from what? Gold is totally worthless at this point in time. Can you make your house payment with it? Can you put gas in your tank with it? Can you feed your family with it? No. There are no "buts" the answers to all these questions is no.

Paper money has no value unless people believe it does.
Gold will always have value.

Because people believe it does. People value gold. No people, no value.

And if the dollar crashes you will be able to redeem that gold for whatever currency is being used as an alternative. You may or may not make a profit, but you won't be fucked is the whole jist.

Says who? You just look at the expression on the face of a cashier at the wally world when you chunk a piece of gold up there as payment. Gold didn't rule in 1929 and it won't rule now.