I don't know what to do.

gunbunny your getting alot of good advise from these guys! One thing I think most people need to realize is there are others out there having these same problems and they only fix them when they really try at it. It could take something as simple as a camping trip once a year or even a longterm seperation to fix the relationship with your wife. I dont think anyone has the right answer for you but you have to find a way to be happier than what you are. For a long time when things would get tough around the house I thought it would never get better but they do if you lay it down like Memike says and stick with it. Hope all the best for you man and hang in there