Ah! I think I understand it all now.
So the distributor should be causing it to alternate between hot and ground, correct? Problem is, it doesn't alternate at all. It just stays full-hot when the engine is trying to crank. Unless I'm misunderstanding, which is entirely possible, because I don't profess to be the most inclined person in the world on these parts, that might mean that the distributor isn't turning to hit a point? Which would explain why we're not getting a spark from the plug wires?
Or, would the problem more likely lie in this ECU?