Can I rant
After dealing with the same things for years with my ex, I fortunately came to the correct solution.
When I was dating my wife, and things seemed to be going well, I told her I wanted some time, not for me as much, but for her.. to really think of who I was, and what I wanted in MY life. I told her up front that my yard of cars is MY passion, I enjoy them even when they piss me off. I told her I would always be there for her, but I need MY time to do MY things, and if, and only if, she could accept that from me, then I was the right guy for her. Well, married 12 years this fall.
At your age, you both haven't truly found your own identities, and it seems most girls don't tend to mature until their early thirties.
Whatever you do, just don't live your life miserable. It ain't worth it.
Grant