Shift Kit

Alright all the stuff came except the gasket, though I've got like 4 different ones now from the wix filter had 3 in it and transgo at 1 lol

Looking at the Transgo instructions my heads spinning, the instructions are pretty confusing but if I give myself some time I think I can figure it out. Only thing I'm concerned about is the grinding the stem of the TV valve correctly and going the right route.
What's the firmness on the two ways the kit gives. What do you recommend between the two and sizes?