it takes time but you can shift without it but the reason i ask is his first sentence...
"This is my first mopar 4 speed so I am not sure if what is going on is normal. When driving say 45 mph in 4th gear should I be able to just down shift to third after letting off the gas an slowing down a little"
slows down and takes the load of to shift, but if you dont get the rpm's right its not going to into the other gear...