High torque starter bind issue

Also, I just noticed that this is an aftermarket 5 speed trans. does the bellhousing have an index hole for the starter at the tip of the bendix nose/ housing?

Some of them are supposed to use a bolt in starter index cup. Look inside your bellhousing and see if there is a steel cup bolted in place or a couple of threaded holes where one can go. You absolutely need to have one, if the bellhousing aluminum itself wasn't cast and cut for one, or the starter will eventually fall out of index, even if you crank the ears tighter than aluminum should ever be torqued, because the starter needs the support at the tip, when the bendix is engaged and torquing the ring gear. If you don't have support on the nose of the starter, it is a weak point and stresses the ears of the starter and the bolts too much.