Stop in for a cup of coffee

Is it normal to not get barely any sleep after losing a spouse? I have been averaging about 3 hours sleep every night since Dee died. Also is normal to wish that when I do sleep that I do not ever want to wake up? Just wondering. I have been very much alone since before Dee died and the "friends" Dee and I had when she was alive have been invisible and have not even inquired as to how Gina and I are doing. Maybe that's how it is in the south? Or maybe because they are all married couples they do not want to bother with a grieving old man. But when times were better they had no problem asking for help with broken appliances which I gladly helped them with including providing them with free service and repairs and one couple a stainless kitchen makeover for free. But they did not even have the decency to show up at Dee's memorial. I do not know. I just know that life is a very lonely place and I feel as though I have been sentenced to a life of emptiness. I literally feel that life has no meaning anymore. Sorry about this post or if I have offended anyone.
it all sounds pretty normal Tom - in time your friends will start come by again - there is a certain level of discomfort after someone passes, they don't want to upset you or "make it any worse" for you so they back off and give you the space they think you need... the emptiness is totally normal too - time my brother, it takes time.