Which can be the hardest thing in the world to do.
Letting go of cherished possessions of the lost is like the final nail in (letting go of the loved one).
Which, IMO, he needs to do badly. Wallowing in grief isn't healthy for anyone. A good, long grieving period is healthy. Continuing to manifest that grief in this thing (the car) and that (other things) just to keep grieving isn't healthy. Tom, you need to find something desperately to take your time up. Part time job, community service, a hobby that fits your budget.......SOMETHING.
It took me years to finally figuring this out. For some it takes longer. For others less time. I agree 100%. But it's been a long time now. Tom needs to let go......and if letting go of the car will help him let go.......then.........
....and Tom, that doesn't mean "forgetting" or "getting over" either. I don't care who you are, you never get over losing a loved one. I still find myself in a decent little cry every now and then over losing Mama in 1984 and Daddy in 1998. Yes, Mama in 1984. I'm still "not over" either. I never will be. You won't either, but you can let go of the hard grief now, it's ok. Your wife doesn't want you to live the rest of your life in emotional ruin. Neither do either of us. Certainly not over a car.
The truth is harsh. Our loved ones are beyond caring. Rather you believe in an after life or not it truly doesn't matter to them at all.
The truth is harsh...and I hope I am not too harsh with all I am saying. You may well be right about lost loved ones being "beyond" caring. We'll never know. One thing's for sure, it's not worth wallowing years in grief and sadness over.
I agree. Time to let it go. Those memories associated with the car are just that: memories. Rather the car still exists or not, those memories will still be there.
The future can only be won by not living in the past. Is being consumed by this worth risking a future?
Sorry, Tom. Maybe not much help to you.
I don't know, maybe. Tom, please take all of this as it is meant, with the love of Christ and good friends. We all love you here. No one is telling you what to do. We're simply on the outside looking in and the past several years have not been good for you. I think it's time you started looking up. You deserve that. It's time to be selfish for TOM. It's ok to do that.
As for the situation: this is the important of a will and setting things in place *before* things like this happen.