One of Our Fifty-States Permits a Friend to Officiate Wedding Ceremony
I'm not going to mention names but...
Many years ago while a member was still in the Army, and still quite young, he met another soldier who happened to be female.
Said member and his new friend realized that they could move out of barracks and actually get paid more if they were married.
member gets ahold of his best friend in the world and tells him what the plan is. Best friend (rightfully) thinks plan isn't well thought out, but agrees to set up a preacher and make arrangements for upcoming nuptials.
Member and soon to be bride drive up from Ft. Knox Ky for pre-arranged ceremony. They stop at courthouse, get license.
Member and bride go to friends house and at the set time a gentleman comes in wearing a polyester suit that was at least 20yrs old. You could tell he just had a bath and shave. Gentleman proceeds with ceremony, I hand him a $50 and he leaves. Best friend insists that he will take license to court house and have it certified the next day. We all go to dinner and then head back to Ft. Knox, and put our plan into action. See the thing about the plan is, that the Army did in fact give the member and his new bride a home to live in, but it was a 1 bedroom. Now this really wasn't an issue at first, but after awhile, not so much fun. Member is a Field Artilleryman and is in the field quite a bit and his new bride is a MP and works funky shifts constantly.
Plan started to unravel about 3 months in and an annulment was discussed.
Member confides in his best friend about the issue. Best friend starts to laugh and then reveals his secret.
The preacher that performed the ceremony was actually the guy that used to fry chicken at a local KFC and members friend didn't take license in to certify. Friend had arranged to pay "preacher" 2 cases of Busch beer and bought the tacky suit at the Goodwill earlier in the day. Said that the reason for the ugly *** suit was so the wedding pictures would be a "hoot". The $50 member gave him was an unexpected bonus.
Member never reveals this to the other party and goes thru with annulment. Member felt that if the mans work was good enough for Col. Sanders, it was good enough for him.
Member learns 2 valuable lessons:
1. Members friend has a sick sense of humor.
2. Never, never marry a Military Policeman (or woman in this case).