There is a gray area retired until your retirement kicks in. My wife was still M-day so never had to use it.
The free policy for you and spouse starts at age 60. If you deployed after 2008 its a quarter early for every quarter deployed to a combat zone. I got mine a year early.
Yes you need to check with the VA. Go to your nearest medical center. There will be service reps there like VFW etc... They have trained VA benefits reps who will help you fill out the paperwork and guide you through the process. It takes time. My first claim took two years. They've got quicker. The tax free money every month is nice. Both wife and I get a payment. Payment is based on dependents and disability rating. Rating is determined by the VA.