Respectfully request advice as newly divorced dad
The wife left, took my daughter, hid/dumped thousands of debt.
After getting upset initially, my highest priority is getting my daughter back into my life.
Right now they are both 1053 miles away at her parents.
I asked the wife to move back to the city (San Antonio) and she said she would eventually-she even promised to pay back debt.
With the deception of hiding debt, I don’t trust her, but have been completely kind/amicable in order to facilitate any kind of compromise.
We haven’t mentioned a lawyer, just bills, child’s schooling, visitation (to include that she offered to buy me plane tickets)
So my thought process is to supplement her income some, but have her sign over debt that she has accrued.
From what I understand, men have given ex wives credit cards to which the court did NOT recognize as child support, and am thinking that a direct payment of her vehicle, her student loan, etc. will not count as support if it comes to that.
So I guess I need to document money given to her, play nice, and work towards a plan of them moving back (if that is really a thing)
I am at a loss as to what things I should do so I am asking for help. Please and thank you!
First of all, I'm sorry you're going through this.
Second and most important, the very first thing you need to do is see an attorney ASAP!
Listen to what the lawyer tells you to do and then do that.
From this point on, your wife's name is Plaintiff.
I know it's incredibly hard to think that a person you would take a bullet for has done this. I get it, trust me I understand! It sucks!
She has already proven she's looking out for her interests and yours don't count.
When the dust finally settled with my divorce, I learned that I had four credit cards that were in default for non payment, she had taken out a loan for her mother, bounced checks and used an expired P.O.A. to lease a apartment, that she quit paying rent on.
The total financial hit was $28K and that was in 1995. That didn't include the attorney, and other fall out that didn't make it to court.
I, not unlike you, felt I should be taking care of my son. Every nickle I gave her for my son was never counted and I gave it to her again.
The system sucks, you were born with a ***** and therefore in the wrong.
Third, when you do get to see your child, don't bad mouth your "ex". Kids are sponges and soak that stuff up. If she's bad mouthing you, it'll come out in the wash. Don't use a kid as a tool.
I could tell you more, but the most important advice has been given. Go see an attorney first thing in the AM.
If you're still in the military, your C.O.C will understand, if not, your boss will.
Good luck.
