Hit the proverbial wall....

I've seen the nasty side effects of psych meds up close and personal (not me) so I understand what you're going through as far as that is concerned. Also, it's hard not to be depressed when in constant pain and not having the ability to do what you want to do.

As for the back, I have seen so many people with the effects of back pain and the things that guys like us do to ourselves in our younger (and sometimes older) years. I can only sympathize with you. I cracked T-11 when I was 20 and am thankful every day that I can still get out and do any sort of physical work.

My wife has been battling all sorts of physical maladies over the last several years. It is very hard for her to be accepting of needing my help, very likely a contributor to your depression as we want to be able to do things for ourselves. I will avoid the cliches...