So you've lived with her for 12 years (by the way in most states that makes you married), so she must have some redeeming qualities, or you've been nuts for 11 years. Ask her to go to counseling with you and figure out if you can fix what's wrong, before something worse happens. ( I've been married to the same woman for 46 years and I'm still wrenching on the same Dart we dated in when we were in high school, plus 2 more.)