MSD 7531 PROGRAMING TROUBLE, HELP!

I have a 7531 digital 7, and the hand held monitor for changing rpm, etc in the program of the 7531. When trying to go to shift light, rhen gear select rpm, it won't go from SHIFT to the next level to set shift light rpm or number of gears. I have to have a way to only allow two shifts, as my new TF valve body is a safe neutral, with shift pattern P R 1 2 3 N. Using the regular rpm switch would shift it into neutral before the end of the run, not a good plan! I attempted to hook up my laptop, but can't make that connect, possibly due to a poor nine pin to usb converter, or no com port selected?
anybody got any ideas? I could as a last resort hook up a relay to my Dedenbear cc and use a throttle stop circuit to run a relay, only allowing a ground for the rpm switch for a certain time period. But that adds more wiring and doesn't allow different rpm selection on each shift like the MSD shift light does, if i can ever get into the program to set it!
i spent ten minutes on the phone with MSD tech, going through the motions of using the hand held monitor to set rpm values, and every time i go from SHIFT to rpm/gear select it goes to the wrong part of the program . The tech guy didn't have an answer, and i then tried to go to my laptop and i can't get connected to the MSD for either a poor nine pin to usb converter, or no com port selected? can anyone help with this can of worms? I have a new nine pin to usb converter ordered, to arrive tomorrow. If that will allow access to the MSD program, i might be able to set this thing properly, but any help here or input appreciated!!!!