Stop in for a cup of coffee

So just got home. We had one of our renters call in with a bad microwave. The crew Jodi uses for rental property maint dropped the ball so guess who got to pick it up? Yep. Bunch of Hispanics in the house I am guessing two separate families with two generations on one side and three on the other. They were chattering away while we put in new over stove microwave, had no idea I am basically fluent in Spanish! When we left I thanked the old man as the Patron and we got to chattering about the roof. He used to be a roofer. Our renter explained they were “visiting” from New York when we got there this evening. When we left and I addressed the Patron you could have heard a pin drop! It was classic, and a lot of fun! I found a bunch of tequila bottles above microwave in the vent cubby. He explained they were for decoration, now that is some creativity right there! Hah!
I used to know basic street police Spanish and ask:
Where do you live?
Are these your drugs?
Is this your gun?
Put your hands up?
They usually understood English and just played dumb. When I say just take them out and shoot 'em, they always seemed to amazingly understand what I was saying and cooperate a little better.