Ran over cell phone with mower and the cell phone was barely scratched.

My dandelions duck when they hear the mower start up. To whack 'em off, I have to put the skirt down all the way as far as it goes, and that gives my wife a heck of a workout.
The next day, the duckers are up like excited teenage boys.
She says she's getting too old for that now, so Ima gonna have to take over.
no puns intended ; true story.