Lone Ranger and Tonto

A tennis pro has a huge tournament 2 weeks away when he starts having severe soreness in his elbow. He rushes to his doctor to get checked out. The doctor tells him he just got a new machine that can tell him about any of his ailments from a urinalysis. Piss in this cup. So the doctor takes the urine sample back to the secret room with the secret machine and comes back with a tiny ticker tape. You just have tennis elbow. Here is some salve it will be fine before your tournament in 2 weeks. So a week and a half later the tennis pro feels no better. He rushes back to the doctor and said Doc you ripped me off. My elbow feels no better and you don't have a secret machine that can test my urine. The doctor replied...look I'm very busy right now take this cup and bring the fresh sample back and Ill test it for free. So the tennis pro decides he is going to trick the doctor. He puts his wife's piss in the cup along with some of his dog's urine. Then he jerks off in the cup and rushes back to the doctors office. The doctor took the cup back to the secret room with the secret machine and this time comes back with a much longer ticker tape. The tennis pro is like well Doc what's the verdict do I still have tennis elbow. The doctor replied...Buddy you have problems. The tennis pro said well I thought you claimed I only have tennis elbow. The doctor said no it's much worse and the tennis pro replied how much worse could it be. The doctor replied...Well your wife is pregnant by the mail man; your dog has worms and if you don't quit jerking off in your urine samples you will never get rid of your freakin' tennis elbow.