Newb with no Mopar

...my dad says as long as I live under his roof I can't get a mopar.
I'm one of those deranged [expletive deleted]ers that exploits flaws in reasoning - often in a manner similar to the dreaded Djinn granting a poorly-crafted wish. In this case, I'd seek out a 1978 Camaro with no engine or transmission (super cheap) and transplant the entire powertrain from a junkyard Cordoba or something. That's how I roll. ;-)