Search results for query: *

sorry ladies i thought this was just too good...... MEN ARE JUST HAPPIER PEOPLE NICKNAMES If Laura, Kate and Sarah go out for lunch, they will call each other Laura, Kate and Sarah. If Mike, Dave and John go out, they will affectionately refer to each other as Fat Boy, Godzilla and...

A Drunk man is stumbling through the woods totally drunk when he comes upon a preacher baptizing people in the river. He proceeds to walk into the water and subsequently bumps into the preacher. The preacher turns around and is almost overcome by the smell of alcohol whereupon he asks the...

follow this along carefully as there is amoral to the story at the end..... The hotel proprietor takes the 100 dollar bill and runs to pay his debt to the butcher. The butcher takes the 100 dollar bill, and runs to pay his debt to the hog farmer. The hog farmer takes the 100 dollar...

SOME OLD...SOME NEW... ...AND THAT'S WHEN THE FIGHT STARTED.... My wife sat down on the couch next to me as I was flipping channels. She asked, 'What's on TV?' I said, 'Dust.' And that's when the fight started.... ............................................ My wife and I...

these are all true events that won themselve top ten honors in the 2008 darwin awards.....Yes, it's that magical time of year again when the Darwin Awards are bestowed, honoring the least evolved among us. Here is the glorious winner: 1. When his 38 caliber revolver failed to fire at his...

don't know if these actually work or not but it is intresting.... 1. To remove a bandage painlessly, Saturate the bandage with vodka. The stuff dissolves adhesive. 2. To clean the caulking around bathtubs and showers, Fill a trigger-spray bottle with vodka, spray the caulking, Let set...

Question: How many days in a week? Answer: 6 Saturdays, 1 Sunday Question: When is a retiree's bedtime? Answer: Three hours after he falls asleep on the couch. Question: How many retirees to change a light bulb? Answer: Only one, but it might take all day. Question: What's the...

Thoughts From a Wandering Mind :read2: these are quick little one liners that jab ya.. I planted some bird seed. A bird came up. Now I don't know what to feed it. ~~~ I had amnesia once -- or twice. ~~~ I went to San Francisco. I found someone's heart. Now what? ~~~ Protons have...

ok it has been awhile since i posted a joke so here it goes. i have always been a sucker for the hit and run kinda joke what can i say....here is enough yo mama's so fat jokes that you could build a stand up act around it! Yo momma's so fat, she makes Free Willy look like a tic tac Yo...

maybe not as funny as funny can be but it sadly refelects alot of us today...:-\" "Hello! You have reached the automated answering service of your school. In order to assist you in connecting to the right staff member, please listen to all the options before making a selection: * To lie...

a young kid gets his first job at a drugstore. he reports to work and the store manager greets him. he shows him around a bit and explains his duties. the manager then says " the first rule in retail is to help to get the extra ring". he says "suggestive sales will help you become sucessful in...

Top Twenty Ways to Tell Someone Their Fly Is Unzipped .... 20) The cucumber has left the salad. 19) I can see the gun of Navarone. 18) Someone tore down the wall, and your Pink Floyd is hanging out. 17) You've got Windows on your laptop. 16) Sailor Ned's trying to take a little shore...

with this politically correct world we live in, :salute: here are a few new ways to say some one is stupid A few clowns short of a circus A few fries short of a Happy Meal An experiment in artificial stupidity A few beers short of a six-pack Dumber...