From email... Hollywood Squares'

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Frankie

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FOR THOSE of us WHO REMEMBER

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These great questions and answers are from the days when Hollywood

Squares' game show responses were spontaneous, not scripted, as they are now!



Q. Paul, what is a good reason for pounding meat?

A. Paul Lynde: Loneliness!

(The audience laughed so long and so hard it took up almost 15 minutes of the show!)


Q. Do female frogs croak?


A. Paul Lynde: If you hold their little heads under water long enough.


Q. If you're going to make a parachute jump, at least how high should you be?


A. Charley Weaver: Three days of steady drinking should do it.


Q. True or False, a pea can last as long as 5,000 years...


A. George Gobel: Boy, it sure seems that way sometimes.


Q. You've been having trouble going to sleep. Are you probably a man or a woman?


A. Don Knotts: That's what's been keeping me awake.


Q. Which of your five senses tends to diminish as you get older?


A. Charley Weaver: My sense of decency..



Q. As you grow older, do you tend to gesture more or less with your hands while talking?


A. Rose Marie: You ask me one more growing old question Peter, and I'll give you a gesture you'll never forget.


Q. Paul, why do Hell's Angels wear leather?


A. Paul Lynde: Because chiffon wrinkles too easily.


Q. Charley, you've just decided to grow strawberries. Are you going to get any during the first year?


A. Charley Weaver: Of course not, I'm too busy growing strawberries.



Q. Can boys join the Camp Fire Girls?


A. Marty Allen: Only after lights out.


Q. When you pat a dog on its head he will wag his tail. What will a goose do?


A. Paul Lynde: Make him bark?


Q. If you were pregnant for two years, what would you give birth to?


A. Paul Lynde: Whatever it is, it would never be afraid of the dark..


Q. According to Ann Landers, is there anything wrong with getting into the habit of kissing a lot of people?


A. Charley Weaver: It got me out of the army.


Q. Back in the old days, when Great Grandpa put horseradish on his head, what was he trying to do?


A. George Gobel: Get it in his mouth.


Q. Who stays pregnant for a longer period of time, your wife or your elephant?


A. Paul Lynde: Who told you about my elephant?


Q. Jackie Gleason recently revealed that he firmly believes in them and has actually seen them on at least two occasions. What are they?


A. Charley Weaver: His feet.


Q. According to Ann Landers, what are two things you should never do in bed?


A. Paul Lynde: Point and laugh
 
Great show! Watched it,as a kid. The comedy was so much better back then.
 
I agree. Hollywood Squares was the kind of show that, no matter how many attempts were made to bring it back, the original will never be surpassed. Anybody know if the Game Show Network plays reruns?
 
Thanks for the memories! I always enjoyed Hollywood Squares. Gread ad-lib comedy.
 
Every episode is available on DVD. That was a good show.
 
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