Confucius Say

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Woman who sleeps with butcher gets the sausage.

Woman who displays too much limb often finds self up tree.
 
Man who goes to bed with itchy butt, wakes up with stinky finger...

Man who farts in church, sits in own pew...

Man who goes through airport turnstyle sideways, going to Bangkok...
 
Foolish man give wife gift o grand piano. Wise man give wife gift of upright organ.
 
Man who go to bed horny, wake up with solution in hand.

Man who live in glass house, should dress in basement!

Girl who wear paper dress, should not sit near fireplace!
 
We used to throw these made up book titles in when the confusious sayings started to rip out...

"Rusty Bed Springs" by: I. Pee Nightley

"Under the Bleachers" by: See More Butt

"Antlers in the Tree" by: Who Goosed the Moose

"Trails in ther Sand" by: Peter Draggin

"Race to the Outhouse" by: Betty Don't, co-authored Willy Make-it
 
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