shovhd
Well-Known Member
Just imagine sitting in traffic on your way to work and hearing this.
Many Newfoundland folks DID hear this on the 94.7- OZ - FM morning show in St.
John's NFLD.
The DJs play a game where they award winners great prizes. The game is
called "Mate Match". The DJs call someone at work and ask if they are
married or seriously involved with someone.
If the contestant answers "yes", he or she is then asked 3 random yet
highly personal questions. The person is also asked to divulge the name
of their partner (with phone number) for verification. If their partner
answers those same three questions correctly, they both win the prize.
One particular game, however,several months ago made the St. John's
audience drop to its knees with laughter and is possibly the funniest
thing they've ever heard yet. Read this and find out why.. Anyway, here's
how it all went down:
[FONT=Times New Roman, Times]DJ: "Hey! This is Ed on 94.7 OZ -FM. Have you ever heard of 'Mate[/FONT]
[FONT=Times New Roman, Times]Match'?"[/FONT]
[FONT=Times New Roman, Times]Contestant: (laughing) "Yes, I have. [/FONT]
[FONT=Times New Roman, Times]DJ: "Great! Then you know we're giving away a trip to the Gold Coast if[/FONT]
[FONT=Times New Roman, Times]you win. What is your name? First only please."[/FONT]
[FONT=Times New Roman, Times]Contestant: "Brian."[/FONT]
[FONT=Times New Roman, Times]DJ: "Brian, are you married or what?" [/FONT]
[FONT=Times New Roman, Times]Brian: (laughing nervously) "Yes, I am married."[/FONT]
[FONT=Times New Roman, Times]DJ: "Thank you. Now, what is your wife's name? First only please."[/FONT]
[FONT=Times New Roman, Times]Brian: "Sara."[/FONT]
[FONT=Times New Roman, Times]DJ: "Is Sara at work, Brian?"[/FONT]
[FONT=Times New Roman, Times]Brian: "She is gonna kill me."[/FONT]
[FONT=Times New Roman, Times]DJ: "Stay with me here, Brian! Is she at work?"[/FONT]
[FONT=Times New Roman, Times]Brian: (l aughing) "Yes, she's at work."[/FONT]
[FONT=Times New Roman, Times]DJ: "Okay, first question - when was the last time you had sex?"[/FONT]
[FONT=Times New Roman, Times]Brian: "About 8 o'clock this morning."[/FONT]
[FONT=Times New Roman, Times]> [/FONT]
[FONT=Times New Roman, Times]DJ: "Atta boy, Brian."[/FONT]
[FONT=Times New Roman, Times]Brian: (laughing sheepishly) "Well..."[/FONT]
[FONT=Times New Roman, Times]DJ: "Question #2 - How long did it last?"[/FONT]
[FONT=Times New Roman, Times]Brian: "About 10 minutes."[/FONT]
[FONT=Times New Roman, Times]> [/FONT]
[FONT=Times New Roman, Times]> DJ: "Wow! You really want that trip, huh? No one would ever have said[/FONT]
[FONT=Times New Roman, Times]> that if a trip wasn't at stake."[/FONT]
[FONT=Times New Roman, Times]Brian: "Yeah, that trip sure would be nice."[/FONT]
[FONT=Times New Roman, Times]DJ: "Okay. Final question. Where did you have sex at 8 o'clock this[/FONT]
[FONT=Times New Roman, Times]morning?"[/FONT]
[FONT=Times New Roman, Times]Brian: (laughing hard) "I, ummm, I, well..."[/FONT]
[FONT=Times New Roman, Times]DJ: "This sounds good, Brian. Where was it at?"[/FONT]
[FONT=Times New Roman, Times]Brian: "Not that it was all that great, but her mum is staying with us[/FONT]
[FONT=Times New Roman, Times]for a couple of weeks..."[/FONT]
[FONT=Times New Roman, Times]DJ: "Uh huh..."[/FONT]
[FONT=Times New Roman, Times]Brian: "...and the Mother-In-Law was in the shower at the time."[/FONT]
[FONT=Times New Roman, Times]DJ: "Atta boy, Brian."[/FONT]
[FONT=Times New Roman, Times]Brian: "On the kitchen table."[/FONT]
[FONT=Times New Roman, Times]DJ: "Not that great?? That is more adventure than the previous hundred[/FONT]
[FONT=Times New Roman, Times]times I've done it. Okay folks, I will put Brian on hold, get his wife's[/FONT]
[FONT=Times New Roman, Times]work number and call her up. You listen to this."[/FONT]
[FONT=Times New Roman, Times][ 3 minutes of commercials follow. ][/FONT]
[FONT=Times New Roman, Times]DJ: "Okay audience; let's call Sarah, shall we?"[/FONT]
[FONT=Times New Roman, Times]Touchtones.....ringing....)[/FONT]
[FONT=Times New Roman, Times]Clerk: "Kinkos."[/FONT]
[FONT=Times New Roman, Times]DJ: "Hey, is Sarah around there somewhere?"[/FONT]
[FONT=Times New Roman, Times]Clerk: "This is she.."[/FONT]
[FONT=Times New Roman, Times]DJ: "Sarah, this is Ed with 94.7 OZ-FM. We are live on the air right[/FONT]
[FONT=Times New Roman, Times]now and I've been talking with Brian for a couple of hours now."[/FONT]
[FONT=Times New Roman, Times]Sarah: (laughing) "A couple of hours?"[/FONT]
[FONT=Times New Roman, Times]DJ: "Well, a while now. He is on the line with us. Brian knows not to[/FONT]
[FONT=Times New Roman, Times]give any answers away or you'll lose. Sooooooo... do you know the rules[/FONT]
[FONT=Times New Roman, Times]of 'Mate Match'?"[/FONT]
[FONT=Times New Roman, Times]Sarah: "No."[/FONT]
[FONT=Times New Roman, Times]DJ: "Good!"[/FONT]
[FONT=Times New Roman, Times]Brian: (laughing)[/FONT]
[FONT=Times New Roman, Times]Sarah: (laughing) "Brian, what the hell are you up to?"[/FONT]
[FONT=Times New Roman, Times]Brian: (laughing) "Just answer his questions honestly, okay? Be[/FONT]
[FONT=Times New Roman, Times]completely honest."[/FONT]
[FONT=Times New Roman, Times]DJ: "Yeah yeah yeah. Sure. Now, I will ask you 3 questions, Sarah. If[/FONT]
[FONT=Times New Roman, Times]your answers match Brian's answers, then the both of you will be off to[/FONT]
[FONT=Times New Roman, Times]the Gold Coast for 5 days on us.[/FONT]
[FONT=Times New Roman, Times]Sarah: (laughing) "Yes." [/FONT]
[FONT=Times New Roman, Times]DJ: "All right. When did you last have sex, Sarah?"[/FONT]
[FONT=Times New Roman, Times]Sarah: "Oh God, Brian....uh, this morning before Brian went to work."[/FONT]
[FONT=Times New Roman, Times]DJ: "What time?"[/FONT]
[FONT=Times New Roman, Times]Sarah: "Around 8 this morning."[/FONT]
[FONT=Times New Roman, Times]DJ: "Very good. Next question. How long did it last?"[/FONT]
[FONT=Times New Roman, Times]Sarah: "12, 15 minutes maybe."[/FONT]
[FONT=Times New Roman, Times]DJ: "Hmmmm. That's close enough. I am sure she is trying to protect[/FONT]
[FONT=Times New Roman, Times]his manhood. We've got one last question, Sarah. You are one question[/FONT]
[FONT=Times New Roman, Times]away from a trip to the Gold Coast. Are you ready?"[/FONT]
[FONT=Times New Roman, Times]Sarah: (laughing) Yes."[/FONT]
[FONT=Times New Roman, Times]DJ: "Where did you have it?"[/FONT]
[FONT=Times New Roman, Times]Sarah: "OH MY GOD, BRIAN!! You didn't tell them that did you?"[/FONT]
[FONT=Times New Roman, Times]Brian: "Just tell him, honey."[/FONT]
[FONT=Times New Roman, Times]DJ: "What is bothering you so much, Sarah?"[/FONT]
[FONT=Times New Roman, Times]Sarah: "Well..."[/FONT]
[FONT=Times New Roman, Times]DJ: "Come on, Sarah.....where did you have it?[/FONT]
[FONT=Times New Roman, Times]Sarah: "Up the arse....."[/FONT]
[FONT=Times New Roman, Times]After a long pause, the DJ said, "Folks, we need to take a station break."[/FONT]
[FONT=Times New Roman, Times]And the drivers of NFLD almost crashed their cars laughing![/FONT]
[FONT=Times New Roman, Times]P.S. : The contestants won the trip! [/FONT]
[FONT=Times New Roman, Times]God I love Newfs.[/FONT]
Many Newfoundland folks DID hear this on the 94.7- OZ - FM morning show in St.
John's NFLD.
The DJs play a game where they award winners great prizes. The game is
called "Mate Match". The DJs call someone at work and ask if they are
married or seriously involved with someone.
If the contestant answers "yes", he or she is then asked 3 random yet
highly personal questions. The person is also asked to divulge the name
of their partner (with phone number) for verification. If their partner
answers those same three questions correctly, they both win the prize.
One particular game, however,several months ago made the St. John's
audience drop to its knees with laughter and is possibly the funniest
thing they've ever heard yet. Read this and find out why.. Anyway, here's
how it all went down:
[FONT=Times New Roman, Times]DJ: "Hey! This is Ed on 94.7 OZ -FM. Have you ever heard of 'Mate[/FONT]
[FONT=Times New Roman, Times]Match'?"[/FONT]
[FONT=Times New Roman, Times]Contestant: (laughing) "Yes, I have. [/FONT]
[FONT=Times New Roman, Times]DJ: "Great! Then you know we're giving away a trip to the Gold Coast if[/FONT]
[FONT=Times New Roman, Times]you win. What is your name? First only please."[/FONT]
[FONT=Times New Roman, Times]Contestant: "Brian."[/FONT]
[FONT=Times New Roman, Times]DJ: "Brian, are you married or what?" [/FONT]
[FONT=Times New Roman, Times]Brian: (laughing nervously) "Yes, I am married."[/FONT]
[FONT=Times New Roman, Times]DJ: "Thank you. Now, what is your wife's name? First only please."[/FONT]
[FONT=Times New Roman, Times]Brian: "Sara."[/FONT]
[FONT=Times New Roman, Times]DJ: "Is Sara at work, Brian?"[/FONT]
[FONT=Times New Roman, Times]Brian: "She is gonna kill me."[/FONT]
[FONT=Times New Roman, Times]DJ: "Stay with me here, Brian! Is she at work?"[/FONT]
[FONT=Times New Roman, Times]Brian: (l aughing) "Yes, she's at work."[/FONT]
[FONT=Times New Roman, Times]DJ: "Okay, first question - when was the last time you had sex?"[/FONT]
[FONT=Times New Roman, Times]Brian: "About 8 o'clock this morning."[/FONT]
[FONT=Times New Roman, Times]> [/FONT]
[FONT=Times New Roman, Times]DJ: "Atta boy, Brian."[/FONT]
[FONT=Times New Roman, Times]Brian: (laughing sheepishly) "Well..."[/FONT]
[FONT=Times New Roman, Times]DJ: "Question #2 - How long did it last?"[/FONT]
[FONT=Times New Roman, Times]Brian: "About 10 minutes."[/FONT]
[FONT=Times New Roman, Times]> [/FONT]
[FONT=Times New Roman, Times]> DJ: "Wow! You really want that trip, huh? No one would ever have said[/FONT]
[FONT=Times New Roman, Times]> that if a trip wasn't at stake."[/FONT]
[FONT=Times New Roman, Times]Brian: "Yeah, that trip sure would be nice."[/FONT]
[FONT=Times New Roman, Times]DJ: "Okay. Final question. Where did you have sex at 8 o'clock this[/FONT]
[FONT=Times New Roman, Times]morning?"[/FONT]
[FONT=Times New Roman, Times]Brian: (laughing hard) "I, ummm, I, well..."[/FONT]
[FONT=Times New Roman, Times]DJ: "This sounds good, Brian. Where was it at?"[/FONT]
[FONT=Times New Roman, Times]Brian: "Not that it was all that great, but her mum is staying with us[/FONT]
[FONT=Times New Roman, Times]for a couple of weeks..."[/FONT]
[FONT=Times New Roman, Times]DJ: "Uh huh..."[/FONT]
[FONT=Times New Roman, Times]Brian: "...and the Mother-In-Law was in the shower at the time."[/FONT]
[FONT=Times New Roman, Times]DJ: "Atta boy, Brian."[/FONT]
[FONT=Times New Roman, Times]Brian: "On the kitchen table."[/FONT]
[FONT=Times New Roman, Times]DJ: "Not that great?? That is more adventure than the previous hundred[/FONT]
[FONT=Times New Roman, Times]times I've done it. Okay folks, I will put Brian on hold, get his wife's[/FONT]
[FONT=Times New Roman, Times]work number and call her up. You listen to this."[/FONT]
[FONT=Times New Roman, Times][ 3 minutes of commercials follow. ][/FONT]
[FONT=Times New Roman, Times]DJ: "Okay audience; let's call Sarah, shall we?"[/FONT]
[FONT=Times New Roman, Times]Touchtones.....ringing....)[/FONT]
[FONT=Times New Roman, Times]Clerk: "Kinkos."[/FONT]
[FONT=Times New Roman, Times]DJ: "Hey, is Sarah around there somewhere?"[/FONT]
[FONT=Times New Roman, Times]Clerk: "This is she.."[/FONT]
[FONT=Times New Roman, Times]DJ: "Sarah, this is Ed with 94.7 OZ-FM. We are live on the air right[/FONT]
[FONT=Times New Roman, Times]now and I've been talking with Brian for a couple of hours now."[/FONT]
[FONT=Times New Roman, Times]Sarah: (laughing) "A couple of hours?"[/FONT]
[FONT=Times New Roman, Times]DJ: "Well, a while now. He is on the line with us. Brian knows not to[/FONT]
[FONT=Times New Roman, Times]give any answers away or you'll lose. Sooooooo... do you know the rules[/FONT]
[FONT=Times New Roman, Times]of 'Mate Match'?"[/FONT]
[FONT=Times New Roman, Times]Sarah: "No."[/FONT]
[FONT=Times New Roman, Times]DJ: "Good!"[/FONT]
[FONT=Times New Roman, Times]Brian: (laughing)[/FONT]
[FONT=Times New Roman, Times]Sarah: (laughing) "Brian, what the hell are you up to?"[/FONT]
[FONT=Times New Roman, Times]Brian: (laughing) "Just answer his questions honestly, okay? Be[/FONT]
[FONT=Times New Roman, Times]completely honest."[/FONT]
[FONT=Times New Roman, Times]DJ: "Yeah yeah yeah. Sure. Now, I will ask you 3 questions, Sarah. If[/FONT]
[FONT=Times New Roman, Times]your answers match Brian's answers, then the both of you will be off to[/FONT]
[FONT=Times New Roman, Times]the Gold Coast for 5 days on us.[/FONT]
[FONT=Times New Roman, Times]Sarah: (laughing) "Yes." [/FONT]
[FONT=Times New Roman, Times]DJ: "All right. When did you last have sex, Sarah?"[/FONT]
[FONT=Times New Roman, Times]Sarah: "Oh God, Brian....uh, this morning before Brian went to work."[/FONT]
[FONT=Times New Roman, Times]DJ: "What time?"[/FONT]
[FONT=Times New Roman, Times]Sarah: "Around 8 this morning."[/FONT]
[FONT=Times New Roman, Times]DJ: "Very good. Next question. How long did it last?"[/FONT]
[FONT=Times New Roman, Times]Sarah: "12, 15 minutes maybe."[/FONT]
[FONT=Times New Roman, Times]DJ: "Hmmmm. That's close enough. I am sure she is trying to protect[/FONT]
[FONT=Times New Roman, Times]his manhood. We've got one last question, Sarah. You are one question[/FONT]
[FONT=Times New Roman, Times]away from a trip to the Gold Coast. Are you ready?"[/FONT]
[FONT=Times New Roman, Times]Sarah: (laughing) Yes."[/FONT]
[FONT=Times New Roman, Times]DJ: "Where did you have it?"[/FONT]
[FONT=Times New Roman, Times]Sarah: "OH MY GOD, BRIAN!! You didn't tell them that did you?"[/FONT]
[FONT=Times New Roman, Times]Brian: "Just tell him, honey."[/FONT]
[FONT=Times New Roman, Times]DJ: "What is bothering you so much, Sarah?"[/FONT]
[FONT=Times New Roman, Times]Sarah: "Well..."[/FONT]
[FONT=Times New Roman, Times]DJ: "Come on, Sarah.....where did you have it?[/FONT]
[FONT=Times New Roman, Times]Sarah: "Up the arse....."[/FONT]
[FONT=Times New Roman, Times]After a long pause, the DJ said, "Folks, we need to take a station break."[/FONT]
[FONT=Times New Roman, Times]And the drivers of NFLD almost crashed their cars laughing![/FONT]
[FONT=Times New Roman, Times]P.S. : The contestants won the trip! [/FONT]
[FONT=Times New Roman, Times]God I love Newfs.[/FONT]
