One day, long, long ago, there lived a beautiful woman who did not whine, nag or *****.
But that was a long, long time ago and it was just that one day.
Avoid cutting yourself when slicing vegetables by getting someone else to hold the vegetables while you chop.
Avoid arguments with females about lifting the toilet seat by using the sink.
A mouse trap placed on top of your alarm clock will prevent you from rolling over and going back to sleep after you hit the snooze button.
If you have a bad cough, take a large dose of laxatives. Then you'll be afraid to cough.
You only need two tools in life -- WD-40 and duct tape. If it doesn't move and should, use the WD-40. If it shouldn't move and does, use the duct tape.
Bonus Thought: Some people are like slinkies -- not really good for anything, but they bring a smile to your face when pushed down the stairs.
But that was a long, long time ago and it was just that one day.
Avoid cutting yourself when slicing vegetables by getting someone else to hold the vegetables while you chop.
Avoid arguments with females about lifting the toilet seat by using the sink.
A mouse trap placed on top of your alarm clock will prevent you from rolling over and going back to sleep after you hit the snooze button.
If you have a bad cough, take a large dose of laxatives. Then you'll be afraid to cough.
You only need two tools in life -- WD-40 and duct tape. If it doesn't move and should, use the WD-40. If it shouldn't move and does, use the duct tape.
Bonus Thought: Some people are like slinkies -- not really good for anything, but they bring a smile to your face when pushed down the stairs.
