Longgone
John/68 Barracuda & Dart
You must have friends that are transplants that need this information.
> >
> > Suthen-isms:
> > ____
> > Only a Southerner knows the difference between a
> hissie fit and a
> > conniption fit, and that you don't HAVE them, you
> PITCH them.
> > _____
> > Only a Southerner knows how many fish, collard greens,
> turnip greens,
> > peas, beans, etc., make up a mess.
> > _____
> > Only a Southerner can show or point out to you the
> general direction
> of
> > yonder.
> > _____
> > Only a Southerner knows exactly how long directly is,
> As in: 'Going to
> > town, be back directly.'
> > _____
> > Even Southern babies know that Gimme some sugar is not
> a request for
> the
> > white, granular sweet substance that sits in a pretty
> little bowl in
> the
> > middle of the table.
> > _____
> > All Southerners know exactly when by and by is. They
> might not use the
> > term, but they know the concept well.
> > _____
> > Only a Southerner knows instinctively that the best
> gesture of solace
> for
> > a neighbor who's got trouble is a whole messa
> fried chicken and a big
> bowl
> > of cold potato salad. If the neighbor's trouble is
> a real crisis, they
> > also know to add a large banana puddin!
> > _____
> > Only Southerners grow up knowing the difference
> between right near and
> a
> > right far piece. They also know that just down the
> road a piece can be
> > anywhere from 1 to 20 miles.
> > _____
> > Only a Southerner, both knows and understands, the
> difference between
> a
> > redneck, a good ol' boy, and po white trash.
> > _____
> > A Southerner knows that the word fixin can be used as
> a noun, a verb,
> or
> > an adverb.
> > _____
> > Only Southerners make friends while standing in lines,
> ... And when
> we're
> > 'in line,' we talk to everybody!
> > _____
> > Put 100 Southerners in a room and half of them will
> discover they're
> > related, even if only by marriage.
> > _____
> > In the South, y'all is singular, all y'all is
> plural.
> > _____
> > Southerners know grits come from corn and how to eat
> them.
> > _____
> > Every Southerner knows tomatoes with eggs, bacon,
> grits, and coffee
> are
> > perfectly wonderful; that red eye gravy is also a
> breakfast food; and
> that
> > fried green tomatoes are not a breakfast food.
> > _____
> > When you hear someone say, 'I caught myself
> lookin'', you know you are
> in
> > the presence of a genuine Southerner!
> > _____
> > Only true Southerners say sweet tea and sweet milk.
> Sweet tea
> indicates
> > the need for sugar and lots of it -- we do not like
> our tea
> unsweetened.
> > 'Sweet milk' means you don't want
> buttermilk.
> > _____
> > And a true Southerner knows you don't scream
> obscenities at little old
> > ladies who drive 30 MPH on the freeway. You just say,
> 'well, bless her
> > heart' and go on your way.
> > _____
> > And to those of you who are still having a hard time
> understanding all
> > this Souther n stuff, ... bless your hearts, I hear
> they're fixin' to
> have
> > classes on Southernness as a second language!
> > ------
> > And for those that are not from the South but have
> lived here for a
> long
> > time, all y'all need a sign to hang on y'alls
> front porch that reads
> 'I
> > ain't from the South, but I got here as fast as I
> could.'
> > ____________
> >
> > Suthen-isms:
> > ____
> > Only a Southerner knows the difference between a
> hissie fit and a
> > conniption fit, and that you don't HAVE them, you
> PITCH them.
> > _____
> > Only a Southerner knows how many fish, collard greens,
> turnip greens,
> > peas, beans, etc., make up a mess.
> > _____
> > Only a Southerner can show or point out to you the
> general direction
> of
> > yonder.
> > _____
> > Only a Southerner knows exactly how long directly is,
> As in: 'Going to
> > town, be back directly.'
> > _____
> > Even Southern babies know that Gimme some sugar is not
> a request for
> the
> > white, granular sweet substance that sits in a pretty
> little bowl in
> the
> > middle of the table.
> > _____
> > All Southerners know exactly when by and by is. They
> might not use the
> > term, but they know the concept well.
> > _____
> > Only a Southerner knows instinctively that the best
> gesture of solace
> for
> > a neighbor who's got trouble is a whole messa
> fried chicken and a big
> bowl
> > of cold potato salad. If the neighbor's trouble is
> a real crisis, they
> > also know to add a large banana puddin!
> > _____
> > Only Southerners grow up knowing the difference
> between right near and
> a
> > right far piece. They also know that just down the
> road a piece can be
> > anywhere from 1 to 20 miles.
> > _____
> > Only a Southerner, both knows and understands, the
> difference between
> a
> > redneck, a good ol' boy, and po white trash.
> > _____
> > A Southerner knows that the word fixin can be used as
> a noun, a verb,
> or
> > an adverb.
> > _____
> > Only Southerners make friends while standing in lines,
> ... And when
> we're
> > 'in line,' we talk to everybody!
> > _____
> > Put 100 Southerners in a room and half of them will
> discover they're
> > related, even if only by marriage.
> > _____
> > In the South, y'all is singular, all y'all is
> plural.
> > _____
> > Southerners know grits come from corn and how to eat
> them.
> > _____
> > Every Southerner knows tomatoes with eggs, bacon,
> grits, and coffee
> are
> > perfectly wonderful; that red eye gravy is also a
> breakfast food; and
> that
> > fried green tomatoes are not a breakfast food.
> > _____
> > When you hear someone say, 'I caught myself
> lookin'', you know you are
> in
> > the presence of a genuine Southerner!
> > _____
> > Only true Southerners say sweet tea and sweet milk.
> Sweet tea
> indicates
> > the need for sugar and lots of it -- we do not like
> our tea
> unsweetened.
> > 'Sweet milk' means you don't want
> buttermilk.
> > _____
> > And a true Southerner knows you don't scream
> obscenities at little old
> > ladies who drive 30 MPH on the freeway. You just say,
> 'well, bless her
> > heart' and go on your way.
> > _____
> > And to those of you who are still having a hard time
> understanding all
> > this Souther n stuff, ... bless your hearts, I hear
> they're fixin' to
> have
> > classes on Southernness as a second language!
> > ------
> > And for those that are not from the South but have
> lived here for a
> long
> > time, all y'all need a sign to hang on y'alls
> front porch that reads
> 'I
> > ain't from the South, but I got here as fast as I
> could.'
> > ____________