What are your favorite/most interesting sayings, aphorisms, metaphors, similes,etc.

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You can sheer a sheep every year but you can only skin it once.

Don't throw stones at the prison gates for nothing

Just what are you trying to accomplish?

Esther, you so ugly we stick your face in some dough and make gorilla cookies.
 
A couple of mine:
Piss, Pass, or get off the pot.
Slicker than snot on an onion.

and my buddy likes
"Shines like sh*t on a new barn door"
 
That's the way the mop flops
If the dog hadn't stopped to take a ****, he'd of caught the rabbit..
In regards to how this country is run lately, looks like we've put the cart before the horse
Looks like the tail is wagging the dog
Our government, useless as tits on a bull
Useless as balls on priest
functions like a Ford
 
"War is an ugly thing but not the ugliest of things; the decayed and degraded state of moral and patriotic feelings which thinks that nothing is worth war is much worse. A man who has nothing for which he is willing to fight, nothing which is more important than his own personal safety, is a miserable creature and has no chance of being free unless made and kept so by the exertions of better men than himself."

- John Stuart Mill
 
  1. once you get past the smell ya got er licked
  2. busyier than a one armed paper hanger with the crabs
  3. thats not worth a c$#nt full of cold piss
just a few an old captain i fished with long ago would say :prayer:
 
"How'd that work out for you?" (Usually said after someone does something stupid).

"I'll wait for you to catch up". (Usually said after something was explained to someone).
 
I would rather burp and taste it then fart and waist it..:D
Or.. I would rather fart and waist it then burp and taste it :-s
If your spinning your not winning.:burnout:
Nea high to a grasshopper :coffee2:
And one of my favorites What'cha got on ? Your mind :glasses8:
 
And here I was worrying nobody would respond. haha.

Keep em coming guys!
 
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