Don't know why I waited so long with this personal tragedy but here goes

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So sorry to hear this. I know what you have been going thru. I lost my wife from an auto accident at 39 yrs old back in 10/21/93. It was such a shock because it never crossed my mind that she would go before me since I was 6 years older than her and I had dangerous jobs including mining and farming plus always driving fast cars. I was left with 2 kids to raise on my own. I had to keep my chin up and try to be the best Dad I could be along as also trying to fill the space of their Mother. Believe me it was a struggle having to talk with a 15 year old daughter about the problems and things a girl is a lot more comfortable talking with their Mom about. There was many nights I would hear her in her room crying I would get up and take her into town to get ice cream or something while we talked and cried together until I got her at ease enough to go to sleep which would be after midnight most times. I would have to get up at 4 am to go work. We had been married 21 1/2 yrs . She was my best friend and would help me do anything I asked her to including seining catfish, raking hay while wearing her bikini or any other work plus been a great Mother to the kids. I never had to worry about them while I worked because I knew she was taking care of them. It has been 22 years and I have not found another like her. The best advice I can give is to concentrate on all the great times and be thankful for them. Try not question why these things happened because God is the only one that knows. Brenda was terrified of cancer because she had lost family members from it and she had already had an ovary removed and lumps taken from her breast. The biggest consolation I got was that God took her this way so she would not have to suffer from her fears. It will get better with time but it never goes away. If I can help in any way let me know. I will be praying that God will give you the strength and courage and guide you thru these difficult times, Joe
 
Sorry for your loss. Just sort of deal with it a day at a time. We don't always have to be strong, just when it counts. My suggestion to you is to save the things from her that she liked or that you enjoyed together. Pics, her car, her favorite dress, that sort of thing. My wife died in '84 at the age of 21. Just yesterday I was looking at some of the marriage pics. Not only do I get some comfort from them, but I am also able to share them with all the others who loved her and miss her to this day, including our two daughters who have no recollection of her at all.
 
My condolences on your loss. GOD grant you the peace that passes understanding.

Wish I could hug you. Focus on the positive memories & perhaps try to continue doing SOME of the things she loved, maybe charity or simply driving her car around as much as possible. We are here for you.
 
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