I,m not cheap i,m broke

-
FIRST THING: Leanna, please, whatever you do; don't go dropping a cup size !

This is the first thread I've seen where I agree with just about everything posted. Just a matter of perspective.

"Times" are tough on many and I commend those toughing it out as I commend those starting a "help" thread.

Being at work I miss out on a great deal having time usually only for a quick "lurk see" and when I saw Dave's post re: PSC I thought , hmmmm. Then I read the " Noooo, please don't" and thought , hmmmm, how would I feel ? As others, I wouldn't like "it". But then I thought there ARE others who feel as I do ( like Dave ) in that we feel a moral obligation to help when and where we can with what we can. At times the help may go over and above what we have committed to on a regular basis ( fav' charities ). For me in this case I thought the best way to help would be to gather up all the parts I wanted coated and send them off with a check to be gotten to whenever. I just can't do that until I get back home.

For others there is the sincere desire to help but is not possible for them just now. "Help" can be in many guises though as has been demonstrated by all the well wishing and moral support shown in a myriad of threads.

I truly don't believe anyone is thought of as "cheap" and believe the original post shows the upstanding virtues of the poster in wanting to help out but just not being able to right now. I know what it's like to be down to the last $5 and recieve a helping hand from someone I barely knew ( the X10 and "goes around" now can "go around").

Whether it's coming or going around, in the short time I've been a member, I've never encountered such a vast number of honorable and worthwhile individuals as are on FABO !
 
I know what its like to be broke.But sometimes I do see some members rapid progression on their cars,new paint,new rims and tires,engines that must have costed thousands of dollars and I look at my Duster and there it sits in rattlecan Rustoleum with rust holes and the motor and tranny not in yet and I get bummed out.Some nights,I avoid the Restoration thread altogheter because then I get depressed,lol.But I know i not alone.There are many members such as myself whos cars are no where near complete and sit rotting because they cannot afford to fix them up yet.I know my cars 7 1/4 will not handle the V8 ,but its easy for the member who has probably 2-3 of them sitting in his garage ,but not easy for me and other members who cannot fork out over $500 for one.To the other members such as myself that cannot afford to get that dream Mopar thats sitting under a tarp,or in your garage tooken apart needing parts,please,dont give up.This being my first V8 swap ,this car has been hell,and a nightmare and the parts for it,even a simple kickdown linkage are a pain in the *** to locate and when I do locate them,it costs $$.The other night I was so pissed at it,I even said my next project is going to be a Chevy,parts are easier and cheaper!lol(I was mad,I didnt really mean it)Once you get that car in paint and the engine rumbling,you will be glad you kept patient.
 
i left a good paying job for a moral thing, to look back it realy hurt my famly as we have to move by sept. and because of bankrupy no one want to rent to me.i helped a friend that was either was going out of bissness or die from a hart atack. the shop is doind beter but there is not one of his old friends that would work for under minwage for him. so i have to move on to just keep what i got. my friend is back on his feet now and pay off there bills but they still feel my wife is to go to work to help us live. we have 5 kids all in school and she needs to be here for them cause i don,t need know grand kids right now. i some time wonder if my friends see that. 1 or 2 kids is one thing but 5 is a whole differant ball game. got to go to a interview so rant over
 
I agree with most of what has been said in this thread. One thing I don't agree with is the remark about a good old boys club here. I have been here right from the start and have never seen any evidence of certain members being treated better than others or any clique's. Are there circles of members that converse amoungst themselves that you don't seem part of? Sure is, but they are not exclusive and all you have to do is jump in and start typing. You will be welcome in the conversations. I don't know everybody here and am never afraid to jump in, even if I don't know what I am talking about, which is most of the time. LOL

Pete, there is nothing wrong with your original post. At first glace it may come off as whining, but after closer scrutiny, it is just you stating the facts and there is nothing wrong with airing your opinion. If we could all afford to give every time then there would be no need for fund raisers. I give what I can, when I can. Most of the time it isn't much, but every little bit helps.

Leanna, You better not loose a cup size!!!! LOL


Jack
 
Interesting, But so as to bring us all up to speed here, i haven't won the "Power Ball" yet so there's a lot of "WANTS" that will have to give way to the "NEEDS". Let me say this for certain clarification, I'm Not Broke. I do have a lot on my plate but in my mind that's how ive been accustomed to make things happen. I call it leverage. Kinda "Ya gotta spend money to make money" program. I eat what i want and drive what i drive because i dont like car payments and i have none. When i want to build a car, i build a car. Sometimes i have to wait to buy a part when i FEEL i can afford it. No harm in waiting for something you truly WANT. No one should do without the NEEDS to get the WANTS. That's ignorant and wont do nothing but get you in trouble. Several in my area think i'm rich because they see what i have aquired over the years. I am rich. I have two great children that haven't given me any trouble in raising them up and they are self sufficient and dont call me every day wanting a helping hand. I have a wife that loves me and believes as i belives and has the same goals as i have which makes for a very rewarding relationship. Several that think i'm rich have elected to not keep it in their pants and now have a ton of child support to pay some heifer to drive a nice car. That's called 20/20 hindsite. We all have a choice and some dont like paying for some of their choices. I have worked some very lucrative and interesting jobs in my tenure as a tax payer and have realized some travel and sat my foot in places that no man have ever walked on. I'm healthy and am more so than 99.9% of any 58 yr old. Yes i'm rich. I didn't say i had cash to burn and one should never relate riches to monetary issues...alone. Granted cash is KING in most folks eyes but most dont have a clue on how to take care of money if they had any. I see several here are either out of a job or have just started back to work. One can make money without a job. I've got your attention now. My step father was an auctioneer and the top auctioneer in this area for 30 years and in watching him, taught me the art of trading. I've seen some on here call it "FLIPPING". Call it what you will and set broke while you dont condone it. Whether it's buying a car and reselling it for a profit or buying a log chain for $5 and selling it to the guy at work for $20. That's called trading. I've always been under the impression that a good trader should be able to start the year with $1000 in his right pocket and if he's any good he should be able to end the year with $10,000 in the left pocket. There are ample opportunities in life to make stuff happen if one truly want to make stuff happen. Just an example, one of the wealthy youngsters in the area saw some of my home built deer stands. He wanted 3. I told him $700 each. I build em out of scrap lumber from some of my jobs. All i have is my labor in bulding them. I can do one a day. That's $2100 in 3 days. Granted it took me away from the Speed Chanel or i had to stop working on my car. That's life. Some set on the couch not only feeling sorry for themselves but also feeling sorry for he goofy ***** on the soap opera they're hung up on. On the good old boy comment. Some on here talk to each other more than other even though they have never met. Anyone that wants to chime in on any conversation here is more than welcome to do so. Not aware of any clicks. Hell for that matter even some of us Mod disagree with oneanother but that dont mean we are either in or out of a click. No cost for the advice guys and gals. Use it if you can benefit though.
Small Block
 
Wow! great post Small Block. I don't quite have the talent to put my thoughts to words like you do, but I'm right there with you 100% on everything you said.
 
Not quite sure what you are trying to tell me Bill. I,m not trying hard enough?
 
Not trying to single any one person out DD. Consider this as constructive criticism. If you can use it then feel free to do so. Maybe your opportunity just hasn't presented itself. You are not the only one that has posted to this thread so no i'm not telling anyone anything other than there is always an opportunity to do better....even for myself. But it will need some help from all of us.
Small Block
 
inkjunkie said:
If your meaning is that some times you feel you are not "welcome" here, count me in.
Click to expand...

superdart340 said:
I'm with u on that I feel that way all the time !!!
Click to expand...

Well, your both welcome here.

CudaChick1968 said:
I feel the need to respond here.
Click to expand...

Your post about people not paying for work they wanted snowballed out of control overnight to 3 pages by that night. Crazy! It is the worst having these parts sitting and collecting dust while there owners act like there in storage...and forgotten.

PETE (D/D) and everybody else, I'm with you on donations. I make the money to stay afloat, but sometimes the way it comes in, is not so steady and I feel like another hole just popped throught the haul. (Starting up another bildge pump! LOL!)

LeAnna and I shared the same stories the other night about this bannana roller coaster.

We all have the sob stories to run right along with others here. So for many of us, giving is out. The best I can do is listen, give moral support and perhaps, suggest or point out something on something I know to make it better is all I can do.

I'm going to feel like a heel bad enuff later when the hat gets passed around for a co-worker/freind that lost his entire left arm to a 4inch fire works mortor. (They could not re-attach the arm ethier, to badly damaged. The cheery on top of this disater is his Dad had a heart attack apon hearing the news. just wonderful huh?)

I'll do what I can if I can. But that's it. I can't even afford the to gas up the truck to see him.

Dontae if ya can. Otherwise, don't. Never feel guilty or let anyone make you feel bad about not doing so. IF there so freakin rich, tell'em make a donation of triple the amount they did in your name without re-payment for the gift. Screw them.

Then again, no one here is that screwed up. If they are,:angry7: please make a donation to, "Bigger boobies for everyone.com" in the amount of 1 millllllllllllllion dollors in my screen name. Thank you.
 
daredevil said:
Lately everyday there is a new cause someone wants you to send money to. I always wonder if people look down on me when I dont donate lately.

Absolutely not Pete. I know that there are people here that are just not in the position to give as they have thier issues at home that they have to take care of. Last year at this time I was unemployed and just scraping by and truly scared to death that I would get evicted. I saw quite a few posts for donations and I felt really bad that I just wasn't in a position to help. It really tore me up inside along with the depression that goes along with being jobless. Ain't nothing like cruising the local alleys to find old lawnmowers to fix up so I can feed my dogs to make a guy feel good about himself, lol.

I sit sleepless some nights trying to figure out how to finish my car so I can sell it so I can afford my daughter a school car. I havent had a vacation in three years as I cant afford one.I posted this and a mod deleted it.

I still don't understand why that happened (the thread deletion). You are certainly doing the right thing and your daughter comes first, no doubt. I can't remember the last time I took a pleasure vacation either. Let's see, I took a day off for a root canal, before that it was my mothers funeral, before that it was just to visit her before she died, prior to that it was to move out of the house that my x and I owned, etc.

Yet people ask for donations for people with their own buisnesses and people who I looked at their vacation pics and others with show cars wrecked but insured but some still ask you to help.

This seems like a direct attack on those particular recipients. You are certainly entitled to your opinion but those are pretty hurtful words to those that have recieved from the bounty of the members here. It's each members responsibility to decide wether or not they want to donate and wether or not they feel that the drive is for a good cause. No one has to and no one is twisting anyone's arm. Everyone gives for their own personal reasons, but one thing I certainly would never do is publicly post about the "worthyness" of particular recipient.

Thank Goodness I've been blessed with an OK job with lot's of hours availible. This gives me the ability to donate when I can and really makes me feel better and assuages some of the guilt I feel having been the recepient of donation drive in the past.

I,ve helped so many i cant count anymore....

I too remember you with couple carts of food to help those in need after the hurricane. That picture inspired me to be a better person and I doubt that it will ever leave my mind.

....and seen people turn their backs on people who really were in need because they werent popular.

This I haven't seen but if you feel this way, why not start a drive to help them?

I really dont care who this pisses off because i,m tired of being asked to help people better off than I am.

You are certainly entitled to your opinion but I don't even own my own house but still give when I can or decide that I want to.. Remember, it's not mandatory to give, it's a personal choice.

Pick your charities wisely or when a real need arises people may be too tired of being hit up to give. Rant over.
Click to expand...

You've got a good point there Pete, no doubt and I won't argue it.

In conclusion,
I'm confused about some people saying that they don't feel welcome. I know that not everyone get's along with everyone but that's just the nature of the beast wether it be at a big party or online. It doesn't mean that they are not welcome. I can't really think of a single member i wouldn't help if they were truly in need.

I have truly strived to meet many members in person here locally as well as give them a call every now and again. Like others have said, this board feels as though it's just one big family and like any friendship it takes time and effort to keep it going.

Pete, I hope your feelings about this don't drive you away as I feel that you are a valuable member here for both your humour and technical input and I wish you and your daughter the best.
 
Well, regarding the giving to charity thing.....I attend church very regularly. I'm on the trustees committe, the administrative council, I sing in the choir, I visit our shut ins and help our elderly. I drive the church van when we go places. I am in charge of all of our phone tree communications. (google phone tree). I am in charge of programming our lighted animated sign out front. I am in charge of getting maintainance done around the church, parsonage and the three rental properties we own next door. My wife and I are also youth directors. We do all these things on a volunteer basis. I also give to the collection plate WHEN I CAN. Lots of times we cannot, but we still give our time and service to God. But you know what? Other than church, I give to NO other charity whatsoever. None, nada, zilch. I figure we do enough at our church for charity and others. Pick your charity and donate if you want. If you don't want to, don't. We're not broke....even though I say it a lot. In fact, I think we're quite rich. We're rich in the things that COUNT. We have uncountable blessings from God. We are saved by his grace through our faith in Jesus Christ. Not trying to preach here......this is just OUR lives. I hold nothing against anyone who lives differently, or think I'm better than anyone else. Faith is a huge part of who WE are and I cannot post on a subject like this without saying it. Just remember, there's really no deadline on building a car. As long as you make your decisions on how you plan to build based on how you can AFFORD to build, you'll be ok.
 
OK. My turn. I am not rich. However, I consider myself "comfortable" although this is a new feeling for me. At 47, I have spent the majority of my life "uncomfortable". At the age of 30, when many people are set on their life's path, I was sitting in a welfare office begging for enough gas money to make the 2,000 mile trip back to my home town. I was mentally beaten, majorly in debt, and pretty much at my wits end. I never accepted charity before, and it was a humbling and embarrassing position to be in. All I had in my possession was some crappy furniture, my "new to me" 10 year-old Laser, and car parts. When I did drive home with my tail between my legs, I couldn't afford to insure my "new" car, so ended up picking up a $200 Dart so I could get around. I gladly accepted a minimum wage job, and donated my time doing graphic design to a local community center. Fortunately, right time, right place, the printing company that just lost their designer was looking for one when I dropped off some work for printing. I took a week off work, and spent that unpaid week working for free in the hope that I would be considered for the position. In the next couple of years I met my current business partner, and between us, we pooled $50, opened a business account and registered our business. The next eight years involved 12-16 hour days, times when income was less than expenses, paycheques barely large enough to survive on, and occassions when we doubted our ability to make a go of it. Fortunately, we survived these times, and it feels as though a huge weight has been removed from my shoulders. I still have my projects, and the dream of being able to get back to working on and enjoying them has played a major part in helping me maintain a positive outlook during the hard times.

This site has helped me immensely, and even though I've had my moments on here, and have been blocked by some for spouting off how I feel, and ignored by others for things I post, it still offers a sense of comfort to log on and read what's going on in other member's worlds.

If I have the ability to help someone, I will try. Do I help everyone? No. I certainly don't monitor those that don't, and don't frown upon those that don't. I realize that we all have our personal struggles, and we each deal with these in our own ways. With a group this large there are bound to be many tragic situations as well as happy ones, and sharing the joy and pain in these situations is what makes this forum unique in my eyes.

Grant
 
Sorry all. Sometimes I can't control my evil side. I,m not sure why I started this thread other than it bothers me to not participate like I used too. Might be time for some therapy. At this point all I can tell you is I haven't been happy in a long time. Sorry to be such an *** but they say misery loves company so I guess I was trying to see if any one else felt as I do. Sorry If it appears I singled out some but I saw no other way to express what I felt.I will try to keep things to myself from now on. Sorry to have rained on your parade,please forgive me for being so offensive. A bankruptcy this year and symptoms of another stroke are really screwing with my head. DD
 
daredevil said:
I,m not sure why I started this thread other than it bothers me to not participate like I used too.
Click to expand...

I think you hit the nail on the head there Pete. Feel free to vent, this is what makes your posts so interesting. 8) No one should feel bad for how they feel although venting can sometimes bring some stuff to light.
 
No reason for apoligizing Pete,sometimes things need to be said,discussed as a group.Some peoples lives are more difficult than others(kids,businesses,jobs,income)we all strive to be happy,but sometimes it just doesn,t happen.I give help when I can,if funds permit me too.I notice many members States side have had a rough couple years with the economy,job and home loss,health.Don,t feel singled out,cause I,m sure theirs many others in the same boots as yours.Hope you can look past this and carry on being a top notch member,take care of your family and your health and go on being you.Sometimes ranting relieves stress.Have a good day!:cheers::-D
 
I wish I had the word's this morning for all that has been brought up.
I don't want DD to feel the way he does...
Small Block has brought many great days to my life and all the members here.
I do what I can a little at a time to Victoria and share my days here with everyone.:happy10:
Not just a few members but to all member's 8) I have been on the receiving end and I will always show my appreciation when I can in any way I can.
I am not a rich man and never have been money wise, it's the fellowship and being able to be involved in something other then being a father or grandfather and a husband
Life is to short to complain about anything "harder said than dun" But as I wake in the mornings it's a new day and some time a new way to get something out of life..:happy10:
I have had Victoria two years and do my very best to do what my cash flow allows me and when all the folks here see I am keeping everyone updated on my life it makes my day even better... No vacations here:happy10: and no nice home and shop to enjoy:-D, But I do have my friends and family here that make the way I liv easy to wake up and get my brain moving Pete. I am sure I speak for everyone that I have never looked at any member harshly and made judgment on them for not jumping in on the help threads, But it's easy for me to drop $5 to $25 dolors at times because it's just the way I live, less is more in some way's DD, I hope I have made myself clear that I am not rich just rich in friends and family here :happy10:.
I look at ol Tony F, and Small Block :-Dand watch them move around and work like they was 25 years old :cheers:and it eat's at me some time's, But it's the way it is, so I take the good and the bad in life and do my best to keep a chin up and do what I can.
And let me say this!! It is harder to receive then give.. I know how Leanna must have felt when she seen what has happened to here here, It was very hard on her and Billy to except the support the folks here jumped in and dun for them, I told her on the phone to NOT denie us the pleasure of making things a bit easier on here and ask them to drop her's and Billies pride so we can get the enjoyment of knowing we gave them a small cushion..

I belong to the fabo site and if there is a click of folks here, It's news to me DD.
Your Arkansas friend Mike.
 
daredevil said:
Sorry all. Sometimes I can't control my evil side. I,m not sure why I started this thread other than it bothers me to not participate like I used too. Might be time for some therapy. At this point all I can tell you is I haven't been happy in a long time. Sorry to be such an *** but they say misery loves company so I guess I was trying to see if any one else felt as I do. Sorry If it appears I singled out some but I saw no other way to express what I felt.I will try to keep things to myself from now on. Sorry to have rained on your parade,please forgive me for being so offensive. A bankruptcy this year and symptoms of another stroke are really screwing with my head. DD
Click to expand...

I really don't know why you are saying "Sorry all" Pete. You did nothing wrong. I see most of the posts here are in support of what you originally posted. The bottom line seems to be, not everybody can give every time. Isn't that what you posted?
You think it might be time for some therapy? Coming on here and typing what you are thinking seems to have worked pretty good in this case.
Hasn't been any rain on my parade and I didn't find it offensive at all. If anything, I found it enlightening and it allowed a few other members to get the same feelings off their chests.

Jack
 
Coyote Jack said:
I really don't know why you are saying "Sorry all" Pete. You did nothing wrong. I see most of the posts here are in support of what you originally posted. The bottom line seems to be, not everybody can give every time. Isn't that what you posted?
You think it might be time for some therapy? Coming on here and typing what you are thinking seems to have worked pretty good in this case.
Hasn't been any rain on my parade and I didn't find it offensive at all. If anything, I found it enlightening and it allowed a few other members to get the same feelings off their chests.

Jack
Click to expand...

Thank you Jack, It took me a half hour to type my thought's for my friend Pete.

Hay DD, X2 on what Jack said. :happy10:
 
Thanks Jack Mike and Joe.I figured I would get hate mail. A little support even though my views aren't popular sure helps the desperation depression feelings. It's rough when you start doubting your self worth.
 
Bankruptcy, been there. While it sucked for a time, at least I could pick and choose whom I want to pay after filing. Stayed with the bank and morgage company. Everyone else flipped me off for a few years afterwards, but at least I eat and had a roof over my head. I hated to screw everyone like that. But when it gets down to the ugly side of it.......

Keep the chin up Pete.
 
Pete, please do not let your troubles push you to a stroke. They are devastating to all involved, my Dad had 5 of them when I was 16 and well, to this day 27 years later they are still effecting me. No need to apologize, your perspective is what it is.....
 
rumblefish360 said:
Bankruptcy, been there. While it sucked for a time, at least I could pick and choose whom I want to pay after filing. Stayed with the bank and morgage company. Everyone else flipped me off for a few years afterwards, but at least I eat and had a roof over my head. I hated to screw everyone like that. But when it gets down to the ugly side of it.......

Keep the chin up Pete.
Click to expand...

That's exactly how I'm feeling right now.thanks Rob and thanks Ink not sure of your real name, for telling me not to worry.I think I just need to quit worrying about everyone else. Sure I can't be a big shot anymore but so what.
 
I feel the same way about contributions and a gold membership. Being sick means disability and a severely cut back income. I often want to contribute but just no money.

Lets just hope that helping when we can is enough.
 
You must log in or register to reply here.
-

Back
Top